they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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