i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
too bad you live with your parents still
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Don't EVER smell your tampon
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
