Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
