Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Randomize
