I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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