omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
