Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Buhtt sex?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize
