How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
