Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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