I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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