It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
well you can't waste a boner
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
