Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Text me some of your sweat
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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