did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
