you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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