The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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