we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize