No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
