so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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