covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
