I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
