You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
