if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
