no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize