you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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