How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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