North Korea, Best Korea!
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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