Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
