Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
