11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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