Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
