I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
