I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize