Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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