My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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