i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
it's like iHOP with fire
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
