Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
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