The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize