i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
