Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
