windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
