absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
