My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
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