so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
