Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
