i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
