I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Randomize
