I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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