then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
