Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
