His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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